Box #3 – The Last Box

originally posted on:

Monday, April 20, 2009

ACK! I got behind….

Ok, I apologize. I got behind. I am behind… I will catch up.

On with my story:

So the last time I posted, I told you how I was wrong with my line of thinking right before and right after the layoff.

It took me a while to realize this. Before I did, I sunk into a bit of a depression. I sat at home, I slept till noon, I lost weight (I am a stress starver, not a stress eater) and I generally moped.

I was really down about myself.   I know I was laid off as a result of the economy, but I still took it personally.  Beating myself up like that caused a sort of amnesia in my mental resume.   I started thinking that the ONLY job I am capable of is Travel Agency job.   I started only thinking of my skills within the parameters of travel.   I stopped entertaining thoughts that I am intelligent and adaptable.  I ignored my talent of communication.

To sum it up, society tells us that when I get fired, we should be ashamed.    Being laid off did not feel any better.  I went to bed at night trying to figure out what I did wrong.   I woke up in the morning in a panic because I had no job to go to.

Seriously – what happens to a person to make them forget what they can do?

I know what it was for me.

I hated my job.

I hate not knowing what was expected of me. I hate not having the tools and supplies to do my job properly. I hate being micromanaged into a pulp.

I am over bosses who have the personality of a schizophrenic Wheaton Terrier (no offense to the terriers). I am over “open door” policies that don’t mean anything but “open door.”

I am done letting my time get taken advantage of and working my rear end off to get by while others practically color at their desks and get praised.

Any industry can be hard, I understand that. The Travel Industry seems to have more than its fair share of negativity. From the bottom to the top.

What happened to being in love with what you do? I mean, I wanted that as a child… I wanted that as a teenager… I was sure I would get that when I was in college….

I don’t expect to have a Pollyanna day every day at the office. I just expected something different.

I spent some time working on my resume and talking to this friend of a friend and I made some major decisions about what I need out of a career.

For the first time in years… I went to bed one night and woke up the next morning… happy.

Oh – and the next post will include the “Un” Employment Office Adventures!!


One response to this post.

  1. Thanks for sharing! There is so much “help” out there these days for the unemployed (like me) but so few places to just vent! It’s very emotional and those who are still employed have little empathy, must less an understanding of what it feels like.


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